Saturday, July 30, 2011

My molars are coming out..

@ 1 year 4 months 2 weeks and 3 days

My molars are coming out. Both up and down on the left. But lately, mommy also noticed that my right side also coming out soon. They are now have cut through my gum but still not fully erupted yet.

So, what happened when a toddler's molars are coming out?? Teething pain la...I have been feeling so uncomfortable that I hardly can sleep well at night and mommy also did not have a good night sleep. I have been waking up so frequently till mommy is starting to ignore me. She left me cry till I fall asleep on my own again. Pity me... but i know mommy is also very sleep deprived.

Last night mommy let me wear the sleeping sack during bedtime. She said if I cry again during midnight, she is going to let me cry out loud and with the sleeping sack, I cannot climb out from the crib because it restrict my movement. The sleeping sack is getting too small for me. It was meant for my baby time. Mommy said need to make one bigger one and with a lighter fabric.

Everyone wish my teething pain will get over soon as mommy and myself are getting so sleep deprived.

Monday, July 25, 2011

If only baby is born with a sheet of instructions...

updated by mommy @ 1 year 4 months 1 week and 5 days old

...then at least I know how to handle and bring her up well...
...then at least I know why she couldn't sleep well and kept waking up middle of the night crying...
....then at least I know what she wants and how to make her feel happy and contented..
....then at least I know why she is rejecting her milk...

If only..if only.....

Isabel has not been an easy baby that I've prayed for. She is such a fussy baby that her poor sleeping habits still haunt me till today. Sometimes during those "difficult" period that I am so so so sleep deprived and she is so so so hard to sleep well, I really feel like a failure and I don't even feel like seeing or taking care of her. I know how bad I am to think of that but it is true. I have a phobia when she is not sleeping well and the minute I hear her cry, automatically I wanted to shut my ear and my heartbeat will start beating fast.

Though she is trained to sleep alone and she was doing great during the first few months, now is a different story again. She is like back to her baby time and will wake me up almost every 2 hours the whole night. I am so so so deprived I tell you till I really don't understand why she just can't sleep well. I am really having difficulty coping with her poor sleeping habits.

Maybe she is teething...but her 2 molars are already out...maybe there are others? I don't know....

Yesterday she stuffed the whole pacifier into her mouth and luckily I spotted that. Now I am very worried giving her the pacifier. I took away the 2 small one and left the 2 big ones around. Hubby ordered to let her wean off pacifier coz it is concerning her safety. I understand, of course I understand the danger of it...but..even with pacifier, she is such a poor sleeper, I cannot imagine without a pacifier.

Honestly I am not ready to wean her off at this age. She doesn't understand a single thing angd suddenly we take away her addiction. Can imagine how upset she will be and how is she going to throw her tantrums to get back what she loved?I am not ready...coz with her late poor sleeping habits, I am already running low on my patience and energy level, how can I able to stand the screams and cries she is going to have when we take away her pacifier?

Help..help...I wish the time can pass faster and she will be better in her sleeping habits but I also want to enjoy her "toddlerhood" now....so contradicting...I can't wait till she is sleeping like her brother now..

When is she able to sleep through the night? When can she let mommy has a peaceful night sleep? When? When?

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

My first fall at the playground

updated by mommy

I was at work last Thursday and Friday. My in law were around to help up with the kids. On last Friday, my helper brought Isabel out to the playground in the evening together with my fil and Darren.

Apparently she was holding Isabel's hand and suddenly Isabel could not balance herself and fall knee down on the cement walkway. Her left knee landed on the sandy walkway and had some scratches. Isabel did not cry and she brought her back and clean up the wound for her.

When I came back from office, Isabel was behaving normal and looked happy when saw us. She was running up and down and laughing happily. After dinner, my helper told me about the incident and I took a look at her knee and she started crying hysterically. She clinged on to me like koala bear, with her two legs wrapped around my waist. When she also incoporated some "pushing" kind of action in her cries. She seems like in pain. But how come suddenly she reacted like this? She was all the while fine till I took a look at her wound.



Nothing could pacify her. It took us about 2 hours to calm her down and make her sleep. While I carried her, I can't move without her consent. Or else, she started crying again. Hubby held the ipad and showed her the favourite children songs and I have to hold her standing up. We made so many guesses...stomach ache? leg pain? hungry? too tired?.... nothing solved our puzzles..

Till the next day, she woke up happily and fine...till she accidently saw her wound at the knee and she started the same old episodes again...now we have the answer..she is scared when she sees her own scars/wound/scratches...maybe it reminded her about the fall or the pain..or maybe she just dislike the scars on her legs...

From then on, we have to put her on long trouses, so that she could not see her wound. There was one afternoon after her nap, her pants lifted up and she saw her wound and started crying badly on her bed. She dare not even stand up. Poor girl..now we have to hide the wound away from her...

I hope her wound will quickly recover soon, so that she does not need to wear long trouses in the hot weather during the day...

p/s: Within a week, not only Isabel fall down. Friday night itself while I was comforting Isabel in her room, her kor kor fell from the stairs. Then last evening, kor kor fell from the slide. What a week..it is just so heartbreaking to see the kids getting injured....

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Eye Checkup

updated by mommy

On Tuesday, we brought Isabel for her eye checkup. I was feeling very uncomfortable with the idea of sedation and finally told hubby that I do not want her to go under sedation and will try our best to get the power without sedation. Even if we fail to get this time, we will try it again the next time.

She woke up around 10am that morning and we left for the hospital around 12.30pm after picking up Darren from his school. We reached the hospital around 12.45pm. The nurses were there to help us apply the eye drops for her. She definitely struggled and cried so badly. I hold her tight and there the nurses applied 2x eye drops on each eye. Luckily she was back to normal not long and did not cry much after that.

We then left for lunch in the hospital. Probably she cried and struggled too much during the eye drops session, she fell asleep during our lunch. She napped about 20mins and we brought her up back to the eye centre. The nurse force opened her eyes to check pupil dialation and hence woke her up. She was crying when she woke up. We tried to let her settled a bit before sending her for the power check. I let her played at the play area, I brought her to the room to familiarise with the environment here...I tried all ways to make her feel happy and comfortable but she did not seems comfortable. Probably due to her short nap, she woke up fussy. We took out bread for her, ipad that loaded with her favourite songs and shows...when the optometrist started to put the lense in front of her and shine the torch on her eyes, she started crying and hiding away from them.

Darren was there to help. We tried to show her how Darren did it..try all ways, but she still fail to calm down and co-operate. Until the optometrist told us that she needs to talk the doctor. While she was away, hubby tried to do the same thing on her. She seems fine when hubby did it on her but not until the optometrist came back. She started crying again.

Then the nurse came in and told us that she needed to be sedated in order to get her power check. I was puzzled and reluctant. However, we followed what the nurse told us to do - took her weight and waited for the prescription of the syrup for sedation. I then informed the nurse that she has running nose but the nurse said that it is fine. She should be tired enough to sleep easily after the struggle just now. But later, they told us that the doctor wanted to see us.

We then went to see the doctor and the doctor said it may be too late now to sedate her. It was already 3pm by then. She then tried to check on Isabel's eyes, and she started crying again. She then instructed me to hold her head straight and restrict her hand and head movement. She did a quick check on her eyes and finally the power was obtained...

RELIEF...a big relief...we finally got her power after using "force".

The doctor told us that her power is around 800 long sightedness for both eyes. My heart sank. The doctor recommended glasses for her. Because now her muscles are helping her to see, hence very straining for her eye muscles. Slowly she will develop a squint. When asked whether I can wait or not, the doctor said unless we want to wait till squint appeared. The decision are ours but she strongly recommended glasses. It is a matter of when we are willing to give her the glasses to help her. If we give earlier, it will help her to see clearly earlier. A clear vision is important for a child. Just hope that Isabel can adapt to the glasses faster.

Lastly, the doctor also checked on the nerves in her eyes and said everything seems normal. SHe then gave us a prescription of 600 for both eyes to start with and see how she goes.

After discussing with hubby, hubby felt that it is better to give her glasses, so that it can help her to see clearly. Since she definitely needs a glasses somehow, why not do it now and help us, instead of delaying it and it may pose the risk of getting squint and lazy eyes later. Prevention is better than correction. So we finally reached a final decison that we needs to get her a pair of glasses soon.

It seems like a simple decision but it is not simple at all to me, as a mother. I just want to enjoy hugging and kissing and being close to her face without any obsturction. I just want to look at her pure and innocent look without any accessories on her. Once she is on the glasses, she will be on it FOREVER. This is something that I need to accept and overcome with.

While we were looking for spectacle frame for DArren the last week, we already started looking one for Isabel too though we have not get her power check but we know her chances of wearing glasses. We found one rubberise spectacles and is meant for baby like Isabel. This is a preview of how is she going to look like with a spectacle on her....we will be getting this for her...



Look at the poor Isabel, she was so tired after the eye drops struggle and fall asleep in hubby's arm.


p/s: Isable, mommy is so sorry of what you have to go through and it is just so painful for me to see you struggle through the test. We just want the best for you and mommy loves you so much. Mommy wish mommy can protect you from all harm and mommy is feeling so helpless in this. We love you...